mtv awards on sunday! PART TWO

aight i got my man jack cable to write part two cos i was knackered out! so listen to what he has to say!

kelly clarkson

having a famous dad can be as much a hinderance as it is helpful, just ask k.osbourne, actually don't. k.c grew up on the set of top gear where she developed a keen passion for glossy driving rock. her father was dead against her pursuing a career in the entertainment industry, he knows all too well the pitfalls and predators a young lady will encounter in the shark pool that is popular music.

kanye clarkson

kanye's fake jaw is made out of stretchy rubber, he can actually pull it up over his brow giving the appearance that he devouring his own face. HE IS NOT. it is just a party trick.

50 cent

50 cents' fake jaw is made out of titanium, a premium, but not uncommon, material for the manufacture of bodily enhancements.

coldplay

i hate coldplay. it's a personal thing, me and chris.m have beef that goes way back....to 2003. i was driving my bus, it was just after the school rush and senor coldplay was loitering around a wintery bus stop at the bottom of the dip. he alighted my step, no need for lowering the ride - he is perfectly able - "single", he commanded. i've met his type before, no manners YOU AINT THE LORD OF MY MANOR SON! i thought to my self. be professional jackers, hold it together, I AINT NEW TO THIS. indie rudie schmucks can't phase me. i punch the button, the ticket is confirmed NO TURNING BACK NOW. he fiddles with the pockets on his fitted denim jacket and pulls out his wallet. he stops and contemplates something far off out of my offside window, my head turns, what could he be looking at? "got change for a twenty?" he interupts my stare. no, no i haven't got change for a twenty pound note. however, i've already administered the ticket........you know the rest. *this may not be true*

the killazzz

look to the left, look to the right. the original grime superband, they are kinda like a lank-haired alien ant farm. the VMA's are saved.