the nelly albums

- the best thing about nelly is in his videos and tv appearances and singles and accessories he will always tweak your imagination enough so you believe something brilliant and amazing could happen, which must be as important as something brilliant and amazing actually happening. if people don't have that i will never get to the brillmazing bits because i will be playing ps2 or keying cars instead.

- the sweat and suit thing is a big ruse so nelly could release the most outrageously wet album rap has known. i mean r'n'b albums are normally 10x tuffer than suit, for instance the recent teedra moses record is full of space-ballads and synths that mop up the audio spectrum like crusty bread in your broccoli and stilton soup. and it would fuck nelly up!

- it is important to mention that suit is also amazingly brilliant!

- sweat is quite shit.

- in fact it's not really shit but they fucked up that c aguilera duet debuted at the vmas, boring one-chord funk vamping that sounds like it was recorded just after "lady marmalade" (what happened to rockwilder btw?) - that's a lifetime ago! i don't need this shit anymore and it makes me tired with life.

- i don't need the chest-beating impotent horns in zzzzzzzzz "heart of a champion" either.

- however! "american dream" and "getcha getcha" are two insanely tight st lunatics-featuring twinkly keyboard+hard drums anthems. st lunatics are wicked! also "flap your wings" gets even better with each successive month and now it's number one in the charts, mental! it sounded like number eight with a bullet.

- "playa" has the once-improbable line-up of nelly, missy and mobb deep and will probably win the aesthete div vote for being based around some shit 80s wanktro song. mobb deep's snugly fitting in with 04-hop is in some way depressing, like just as the ultimate symbol of how the east monged everything up this decade.

- and then there was suit!

- which begins with the one-two gentle palm caress of pharrell (electro drumkit and unpleasant keys flourish suddenly in second minute due to delicate nelly/pharrell interplay...mmm the gayness) and jazze pha (elastic-bassed like that twista "badunkadunk" song but better for having good t.i. and nelly verses - the closest track to "ride wit me"-style midtempo blissout).

- oh but then it's "my place" which is wack.

- "n dey say" is that spandau ballet song! "true"! and w/o even a chunky breakbeat on top like wot pm dawn had. it's audacious and lovely and probably why nelly wanted to release two albums in the first place.

- "woodgrain and leather wit a hole" is beautiful melancholy hypnoticness which breaks down in a bizarre double-time hand clap style. "over and over" and "nobody knows" are just as beautiful although they might become embarrassing by next week!

- so you better get suit quick fast.