craig david - rendezvous
...where the south coast soul prodigy proves an important part of the recent rehabilitation of male r'n'b (cf. 112, n.e.r.d., usher). the original version of this song may have been slightly rubbish, but the blacksmith remix is an unlikely success. the beat is shamelessly stolen from dj premier, and i suspect the vocals are time-compressed in the style of most 2-step remixes, yet it comes off as an incredible performance, the swooniest, sweetest, yearningest thing on the radio all year. also, as the remix omits the "getting jiggy just for fun" line, even the lyrics are brilliant. i think i'm in love with craig david.
key moment: the bassline drops out, craig sings "well here i am, writing you a love song/holding back those years, it's been so long", and you can't doubt the fella means it.
28.12.01
young mc - bust a move
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recently heard at frat/keg/jock-type parties in THREE films: dude, where's my car, uncle buck, and can't hardly wait. that's positively trans-generational. is this really the archetypal sound of young american hedonism? that's quite good! i'm stumped for the uk equivalent. born slippy? praise you? fuck! if you have any bright ideas about this from either side of the atlantic, please mail us!
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recently heard at frat/keg/jock-type parties in THREE films: dude, where's my car, uncle buck, and can't hardly wait. that's positively trans-generational. is this really the archetypal sound of young american hedonism? that's quite good! i'm stumped for the uk equivalent. born slippy? praise you? fuck! if you have any bright ideas about this from either side of the atlantic, please mail us!
22.12.01
liz hurley: "I swear on everything I hold sacred, there will be no pictures of my naked stomach on the cover of a magazine."
well, er, damn. this must be proof that liz considers demi moore her natural forebear (they both have awful taste in film projects and a ludicrously over-inflated sense of relative importance). i do like it when heat magazine shows pictures of her when she had bushy, gallagher-like eyebrows and wore awful trouser suits - not because she deserves to be seen as foolish, just that it makes me feel better about about my bushy, gallagher-like eyebrows and awful trouser suits. it's a cruel world when you're a civilian.
well, er, damn. this must be proof that liz considers demi moore her natural forebear (they both have awful taste in film projects and a ludicrously over-inflated sense of relative importance). i do like it when heat magazine shows pictures of her when she had bushy, gallagher-like eyebrows and wore awful trouser suits - not because she deserves to be seen as foolish, just that it makes me feel better about about my bushy, gallagher-like eyebrows and awful trouser suits. it's a cruel world when you're a civilian.
all i want for christmas is a gangsta party.
plus: christina milian update - the song with ja rule is hot. and i hate ja rule!
plus: christina milian update - the song with ja rule is hot. and i hate ja rule!
20.12.01
...........actually i think pink's okay. i really like her new single and i liked the 2 -step rmx of 'there you go' and when you add that to lady marmalade, that makes three songs which i like, so it means there are more good pink songs than good mya songs ...............oh hold on, mya was on lady marmalade aswell.......okay, i like her just as much as mya, which is quite a lot, but not as much as christina milian or cc peniston which is a lot.
i don't understand pink's new single at all. why does she act so relentlessly wacky in the video? is this the real pink? why does the song sound uncannily like younger younger 28s - we're going out? what an odd career move, really. after this video, surely it's too late to ever go back to crazy-sexy-cool r'n'b diva-dom, so what will she be left with? somebody save pink from herself!
(i would also prefer not to have to imagine kissing pink's arse. i mean, she's just trying to prove that she's got 'tude but i swear that line comes off as being super-literal.)
(i would also prefer not to have to imagine kissing pink's arse. i mean, she's just trying to prove that she's got 'tude but i swear that line comes off as being super-literal.)
19.12.01
18.12.01
NEWSFLASH++NEWSFLASH++NEWSFLASH
Race thug football star Lee"I didn't kick him, I just held Jonathan's coat" Bowyer, has been put on the transfer list by Leeds Utd for not paying a disciplinary fine of four weeks wages.
The bloke from Big Country has died.
I found this GIF on the bbc site, i dunno it's just icky that someone sat infront of paintshop doing that.
Yemen (it's a country, i checked) has blown up some al-queda type terrorists, who were cunningly disguised as innocent civilians.
Check out OBL's motley crew, they're kinda like the Wu, but i imagine they have more spangly Rodney 'Darkchild Na Na' Jerkins beats.
In other news, spicybabygirlwhatever Emma Bum-fun has bought a house in Brighton. Whether this is the Brighton on the south coast of England, or the Brighton in newjerseynewyork type place, or the Brighton in Australia is unclear.
Quote "To find a prince, you gotta kiss a lot of toads" Foxy Brown Ill NaNa
Race thug football star Lee"I didn't kick him, I just held Jonathan's coat" Bowyer, has been put on the transfer list by Leeds Utd for not paying a disciplinary fine of four weeks wages.
The bloke from Big Country has died.
I found this GIF on the bbc site, i dunno it's just icky that someone sat infront of paintshop doing that.
Yemen (it's a country, i checked) has blown up some al-queda type terrorists, who were cunningly disguised as innocent civilians.
Check out OBL's motley crew, they're kinda like the Wu, but i imagine they have more spangly Rodney 'Darkchild Na Na' Jerkins beats.
In other news, spicybabygirlwhatever Emma Bum-fun has bought a house in Brighton. Whether this is the Brighton on the south coast of England, or the Brighton in newjerseynewyork type place, or the Brighton in Australia is unclear.
Quote "To find a prince, you gotta kiss a lot of toads" Foxy Brown Ill NaNa
speaking of guitarspunk.........po-faced cumshot g.o.d botherers Payable On Death "incorporate Hip-Hop, R'n'B, Reggae, and Latin influences in their heavy take on music"......?!?!??!?!?!!?
This isnt rock music (altho' i quite like 'alive'). Why do rock bands have to be influenced by hip hop?? were whitesnake ever influenced by rasco?!?!?
if you wanna hear some real music check AG for sepultura's 'roots bloody roots' get the version with pavarotti on it (max'n'pav: two real man divas going toe 2 toe)
which neatly brings me onto spaz of the week, yes its sonny from P.O.D
"jack's cool tip of the week":- if you want mad props on the street you gotta get yrself bling-blongin' precious metal bird on yr arm thing, like ghostface in his new video for a new song what he does. If yr poor you can improvise, i borrowed my mate tamara's air rifle and clubbed a puffin over the head with it, then mounted it on a piece of MDF (ply will do) and stuck it on my arm (left arm, cuz right would mean i'm a fag or something) with glue.
This isnt rock music (altho' i quite like 'alive'). Why do rock bands have to be influenced by hip hop?? were whitesnake ever influenced by rasco?!?!?
if you wanna hear some real music check AG for sepultura's 'roots bloody roots' get the version with pavarotti on it (max'n'pav: two real man divas going toe 2 toe)
which neatly brings me onto spaz of the week, yes its sonny from P.O.D
"jack's cool tip of the week":- if you want mad props on the street you gotta get yrself bling-blongin' precious metal bird on yr arm thing, like ghostface in his new video for a new song what he does. If yr poor you can improvise, i borrowed my mate tamara's air rifle and clubbed a puffin over the head with it, then mounted it on a piece of MDF (ply will do) and stuck it on my arm (left arm, cuz right would mean i'm a fag or something) with glue.
"van halen-like frothing geyser ejaculations of guitarspunk".
yes, it's the simon reynolds faves of the year, which as always features some lovely turns of phrase, but unholy fuck, is it ever long. i don't really get his insistence on damning jay z ("the virtuoso of vanity" apparently) while naming the blueprint 5th greatest album of the year. he did the same thing in a review a while ago, suggesting that he's grudgingly in awe of jigga's music while thinking of him as a complete cunt. make up your mind, fella!
yes, it's the simon reynolds faves of the year, which as always features some lovely turns of phrase, but unholy fuck, is it ever long. i don't really get his insistence on damning jay z ("the virtuoso of vanity" apparently) while naming the blueprint 5th greatest album of the year. he did the same thing in a review a while ago, suggesting that he's grudgingly in awe of jigga's music while thinking of him as a complete cunt. make up your mind, fella!
If you want to impress your friends or whoo (yes, whoo) potential romantic interests, you need to get yourself a Kerrang (TM) answering machine message. My favourite is the "Nigel" from bush one, who's the bloke from bush who isn't boshing Gwen Stefani. Also worth mentioning is the Corey Slipknot one (btw he's the one who wears a mask).
milian's first single am to pm isn't even out in the uk yet. the remix of that song is so big and shiny-sounding, it must have cost 8 million pounds just to master it onto the def jam computer. and it's brilliant. i am still troubled by whether her 'father' in the video is her real father. he looks like a vicious step-dad type, or like michael jackson's dad, but white.
17.12.01
recognize
one in a milian (geddit!?)......
teenie cuban pop strumpet (probably) and all round best thing ever christina milian has done a duet with gravel voiced shit shoveller ja rule, which will be her next single (unless its already been released)
FACT christina has a yorkshire terrier called missy
if, unlike me, you don't have access to the def jam (majfed backwards, weird, eh?) A+R hot-tub, you could check out her website which is a spangly corporate thing, much better than shitty homemade ones
FACT christina was in american pie
here is a mock-up of what i imagine it would have looked like if CM was in JR's video for 'between me and you'
FACT christina milian sang backing vocals and appeared in the video for ja rule's national hit 'between me and you'
one in a milian (geddit!?)......
teenie cuban pop strumpet (probably) and all round best thing ever christina milian has done a duet with gravel voiced shit shoveller ja rule, which will be her next single (unless its already been released)
FACT christina has a yorkshire terrier called missy
if, unlike me, you don't have access to the def jam (majfed backwards, weird, eh?) A+R hot-tub, you could check out her website which is a spangly corporate thing, much better than shitty homemade ones
FACT christina was in american pie
here is a mock-up of what i imagine it would have looked like if CM was in JR's video for 'between me and you'
FACT christina milian sang backing vocals and appeared in the video for ja rule's national hit 'between me and you'